|JON| wait, are they supposed to...
|ME| what?
|JON| like i'm talking normal right now even though i'm being recorded even though i'm talking about the recorder...
|ME| yeah?
|JON| could you use this?
|ME| yes.... it has to be a natural --
|MIKE| wait, so you're recording right now?
|ME| yes
|MIKE| excellent
|JON| so it doesn't matter if i know about it.
|ME| well i guess it... i think it does matter... it has to be natural--
|JON| SOMETHING!
|ME| it has to be natural dialogue.
|MIKE| so Dlugosz, ..how was the thing that you did yes-tor-day ???
---------------------------------
|LISA| um, see i'm.. i'm... ..you know what i realized the other day? i think that i am definately not a spatial person. 'cause i need to have like like directions to get places my dad will try to wr- write me a map. i'm like no you need to say, left on wherever, right on wherever, left on wherever..
|ME| did you know thats actually quite valid?
|LISA| what?
|ME| statistically.. males are better at spatial orientation--
|LISA| really?
|ME| --than females
|JON| they have these.... men and women go through a maze... and, they change different stuff and it turns out that the males will get lost whenever they change the distances, and women would get lost whenever they changed like certain markers like... they see, like go left at landmark, if they change that bush... yeah... you know.
|ME| they proved somehow... they somehow proved that males are have a easier time.. um. imagining like a rotating complex 3-D object. they can keep track of all the 3-D.. aspects of it
|LISA| left here, right here, go through the light, third house on the left. thats what i need. --i dont know heh
|ME| do you have... hard time remembering what direction is what north
|LISA| i have a hard time remembering my right from my left
|JEREMIAH| put an L and an R right there
|LISA| yeah i know, thats what i have to do. but you know what? i saw other people in my kindergarten class with the same deficiency, so i think its not me.
|ME| this there's another one that they said males somehow always know what north is... instinctively
|LISA| actually i'm--
|JON| i do
|LISA| --i actually--
|MIKE| i have no idea where north is.. i dont know where north is
|JON| its that way, right?
|ME| north is--
|LISA| no north is that way, isnt it?
|MIKE| [laughing] everybody points in a different direction.
|LISA| no north is, north is behind us.
|JON| i'm facing east now, right?
|JEREMIAH| this is north.. the south campus is this way. this is north.
|LISA| south campus is that way
|ME| north is towards the ellicot center. all maps of UB have of of ellicot on top
|JEREMIAH| yeah. so its that way.
|LISA| no north is this--
|ME| ellicot is that way.
|JON| ...no!.. no?...oh [laughs]
|ME| look! the doors are right there. ellicot is that way. go... imagine, go down stairs.
|LISA| ellic-- yeah ellicot is totally that way.
|JON| no its not
|ME| the doors are right there. ellicot's that way. ellicot's that--
|LISA| totally.. totally..
|ME| look it, out hall, stairs, doors are
|JON| yeah you're right.
---------------------------------
|JON| [makes the sound of "dueling banjos"]
|ME| i was just thinking about using square dancing lyrics for techno.
|JEREMIAH| ha ha ha ha!
|MIKE| what!?
|ME| like it would work
|JEREMIAH| that's so random!
|ME| [makes the sound of "dueling banjos"] .. that made me think of that.
|LISA| i... i....
|ME| thats... like... it would work.
|JEREMIAH| have you thought about this or did just--
|ME| i even started writing lyrics.... i'm not gonna say any...
|JEREMIAH| ---going to disney world they have like this line dancing thing.. was pretty fun
|MIKE| at disney world?
|JEREMIAH| yeah like they had this like ranch thing they set up there. you go on a boat.
|JON| [makes the sound of "dueling banjos" ... dramatically slow this time]
|BRENT| [hums the melody for "inspector gadget"] ..thats what you were doing, right?
|JON| what, no. [makes the sound of "dueling banjos" again]
|ME| he was doing "dueling banjos"
|JON| yeah
|BRENT| well fine then!! sounds like inspector gadget!
|ME| you know what also sounds like inspector gadget?
|me and jon simultaneously| "In the Hall of the Mountain King"
|LISA| i had--
|JON| that is hilarious
|LISA| --i had to play that once... --
|ME| ever notice that?
|LISA| --and, and since i play the bassoon i was like...--
|JEREMIAH| i love that.
|LISA| --...the big star.
---------------------------------
|MIKE| i have ten other fingers!
|JON| nine other fingers, ya freak!
---------------------------------
|ME| did you know... when they have like a big mac commercial.. the.. the little drips of water on the tommato are really like glue, and.. the meat's not real. its all plastic.i think thats awesome. same with cereal box covers its like the milk is glue.
|JON| icecream is... is crisco, with um.. dye in it.
|ME| wait crisco.... oil?
|JON| what? crisco... lard.
|ME| i never even heard of that.
|JON| you've never heard of crisco lard!
|LISA| [unrelated conversation] no they dont. no actually apples in the fall taste a lot different.
|ME| [jumping into conversation] its not fall until you've had apple cider.
|JON| apple cider
|MIKE| apple cider is awesome.
|JON| i used to drink that so much... i used to go to Mayer Bros... and just eat the donuts, and drink the cider.
|LISA| i haven't done that.. i act-- i haven't done that since like i was a brownie girl scout, and that was a damn long time ago.
|ME| haa you were a brownie.... ..i dont know why that's--
|LISA| i was it all the way up.
|BRENT| arent you still a girl scout?
|LISA| we were--
|BRENT| were you a.. "special" brownie?
|LISA| ....hehe no.
|ME| i saw a clip of that.. the giant... pigeon costume guy.
|JON| that is hilarious. you know that... thats the best one.
|ME| ohh... autumn is by far the best season.
|JON| says you.
|LISA| i like autumn. i like autumn and spring the best.
---------------------------------
|ME| hey whats the deal with "spyware?" is it supposed to be... bad?
|JON| it sends information about you to your company
|ME| right and, i could not care less, so why is this..a bad thing?
|JON| maybe you cant care- you dont care less, but i care le-- i can care less.
|ME| why- why does that.. a bothersome?
|JON| because they're taking information about- they're spying ON me. hence the term spy WARE
|ME| theres nothing incriminating
|JON| huh? - they're doin' it without your permission! they could critically be incriminated.
|ME| ...well, whatever. doesnt bother me.
|JON| well, it maybe it doesnt a bother you but it bothers a plenty of other people like me.
|ME| america's the only country worried about things like that.
|JON| why do you say things? do you know things? 'cause you dont.
|ME| in.. almost.. all of.. europe.. they have.. surveillance cameras on every street corner. thats not without permission.
|JON| they had a story on that about... that was one town in europe- in like england.. two weeks ago in england
|ME| .....the point is
|JON| it was one town! they DO care. ... ::pounding table:: gimme food.